At a time when you wonder which will come first – the police making up their minds whether or not to prosecute Ben Stokes or Christmas – there are some things in life which take a mere nanosecond by comparison with Plod finally sorting out his paperwork. Such as the time it takes for a member of the Warner family to start spouting without engaging the filter system between brain and mouth. If you had to compile a list of the 1,000 best qualified people to pass judgment on the Stokes affair, then Mrs Candice Warner, of Sydney, New South Wales, would not come close to b...