I can still vividly remember Curtly Ambrose running in at me on my Test debut – and I distinctly remember thinking he wasn’t that fast when he let the ball go!
To be fair I had spent a couple of days chasing leather in the field, as Brian Lara got a huge hundred while Shivnarine Chanderpaul and Carl Hooper also got runs.
That gave me time to think about what I was going to do with my first ball. I wondered whether it would be a yorker or a bouncer as all they had were fast bowlers, but I just decided that whatever it was I would be ready and watch it.
I went out to bat late on in the afternoon with Ambrose steaming in, but I was so pumped for it and saw the ball so clearly. I got on the back foot and it then got quite big on me, so I played it down but it went into my thigh pad and ballooned to a catcher.
I remember thinking: “This can’t be right, I’ve waited 15 years for this to get out first ball.” I’d never got out like that in my life and if I had been able to rewind I wouldn’t have got out like that again.
I had to walk off but tried to hold my head up. I thought of Boris Becker after he had been knocked out of Wimbledon in the first round, and how he said it wasn’t like anyone had died.
I did look at the cameras and mouthed sorry to my family who were watching and would have been devastated, and that was it.
I feel I should have had more of a chance. Being one of the leading run-scorers in county cricket for five years I had hoped to get my debut before the age of 33.
There are several of us who’ve only played one Test, and I think it’s ridiculous; you’re either good enough to play Test cricket, or you’re not, and thankfully those days are behind us now.
I was not even in the same country when England next played so I felt hard done by having finally got my chance.
My first-team debut for Sussex had come against Middlesex at Hove. They won the Championship but I was 48 not out as we chased down a total, and hit John Emburey for six to win that game.
It helped having my brother Colin there in the early days. He paved the way for me. He went into the first team early in his career, but as I got a little bit more established I was always looking forward to being recognised as an individual rather than Colin’s brother.
I went on the 1989/90 Gatting rebel tour to South Africa. At the time the England selectors would ask for winter availability, and after not getting a letter despite scoring loads of runs I knew I wasn’t in the frame so I took the opportunity to tour.
It was quite something to see my name on the scoreboard alongside the likes of Gatting, Emburey, Chris Broad and many more.
It was not the international cricket I was anticipating but it was still a wonderful experience that improved my game.
Then I captained England A to India. We won every ‘Test’ even though I lost every toss.
We had a young Michael Vaughan, Dominic Cork, Nick Knight, and Mark Ramprakash – fantastic cricketers.
They all went on to have great international careers so I am very proud to have captained my country and led those guys in the early days.
This piece originally featured in The Cricket Paper, Friday April 22 2016
